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Dear Karl Lagerfeld

If there’s one thing I learned from the stunning Balenciaga exhibit, it’s that man, they sure don’t make ’em like they used to. Do you ever see vintage items from the big design houses — Dior, Chanel, etc. — and wonder why they don’t make clothing that’s as lovely and timeless anymore? Listen, I recognize that a lot of fashion is about art and expression, but if the whole idea is also to make clothes for people to actually wear in public, then sometimes modern day designers really miss the mark.

For example, let’s take Chanel’s most recent resort collection, which debuted in Cannes last week. Are we spotting a trend of UGLY anywhere in these photos??

Are you freaking kidding me with these thong boots, Chanel?? These have to be the ugliest things I’ve ever seen. Not that any of these outfits are particularly flattering. Beyond the dress on the top left, they’re all pretty fug.

If the shoes weren’t enough, WTF is up with these dresses? I would die before I let any of these walk down the runway with my name on them.

Uncle Sam called. He wants his Halloween costumes back. PS, he’s declared those striped pants with the denim waistband an act of terrorism.

In theory, the shape of this dress could be okay. Without the tulle at the bottom. And minus the shooting star pattern.Doesn’t it remind you of the old school wallpaper in pre-schools?

What a pretty dress and … wait. Are those PANTS layered underneath that dress?? Or is it a maxi skirt? Does it even matter? And even though I know they’re not, why do they look like they’re polyester? Women want to look pretty, Karl, not like they got dressed in the dark.

You’re killing me, Chanel. The whole thing is like country B&B bedspread meets Dancing with the Stars. And who styled it with those shoes? Look at the model’s face. She’s embarrassed to be seen in this.

If someone told me I was getting married in Chanel, I’d probably be excited. Unless it was in this. Then I’d cry and call the whole thing off.

Is this real life? Harem pants meet ladies that lunch. Yes, this is really Chanel. Makes you long for the good ‘ole days when Chanel (and many others) were more this:

And less this:

You know it’s true.

7 Responses

  1. Hahahahahaha… yes, just yes to it all. Thank you for the laugh! And to think these fabulous looks could all be yours for just the mere sum total of every penny you will ever make in your life added together.

  2. Thank you for this…I needed a laugh! I think my favorite is the country B&B bedspread meets Dancing with the Stars. Who would ever wear that in public??

  3. Usually I’m Chanel-obsessed, but I cannot stop laughing at this post! Seriously – where did they come up with some of these looks?!? I mean talk about random! Thanks for a much needed laugh! xoxo

  4. OH MY HECK! I’m with you…seriously, there are so many times that I’m just sitting there and going “no woman in her right mind would wear that!” Yeah Karl, seriously take notes…and that denim banded atrocity needs to be burned, STAT!

  5. Eeew! that’s what I like to call “agressively ugly”. what is with the sheer stuff floating under the knees? I feel like I’ve seen several designers attempt that look lately without success.

  6. Hi, I’m new to you blog but I have been obsessed with it these past few days. Reading back I think I’m in December now!.
    Anyways I came across it and couldn’t not comment on this.
    I totally agree with everything and specially those striped pants with the denim waistband !!!
    I love your blog and will keep following.
    Svava (from Iceland)

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